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Help Me Fight My Middle School Anxiety

Share your back-to-school tips with a nervous mom of a middle schooler.

No, this blog wasn't written by my 10-year-old daughter, soon to be a sixth-grader.

She is completely fine with starting middle school. Calm as a cucumber. She's mainly preoccupied with calculating how late she gets to stay up on school nights and getting a hamster.

Not me. I am dying for the scoop about how to prepare for this new stage in our lives and finding tips hard to come by.

For example, this is the first year we haven't had the convenience of buying a school supply kit online and either picking it up at registration or having it delivered to the classroom. 

I'll be the first to admit that this practice is ridiculously indulgent. Going to buy school clothes, shoes and supplies is a must-do ritual this time of year. But I've been spoiled for the supplies part of it, and now I've gotta go cold turkey and do it on my own. I'm helpless standing in the back-to-school section of Target, already fully stocked with mini tissues, hand sanitizer and Justin Bieber notebooks. What does a middle schooler need?

I turn to the and there's NADA info about . (I can barely figure out when school actually starts looking at the thing.) I'm desperate for an online FAQ page for new middle school parents.

I was traveling so I missed the middle school's one orientation night for parents of sixth-graders. Though, according to the husband, they didn't talk about school supplies there anyway. The only thing he remembered was, "Your child may start experiencing mood swings."

Start? She's been having mood swings since she came out of the womb. But what about the school supplies??

My anxiety doesn't stop there. Do they really change classrooms eight times a day? Will she get lost looking for her classes? Will big huge scary eighth-graders bully her in the bathroom? Does she have to carry all those mystery school supplies around all day in her backpack?

Maybe the lack of information for parents is a proverbial cutting of the cord. I can hear the school district saying: This. Is. Middle. School. We don't really need you hanging around your kid anymore, so BUZZ OFF parent.

With that in mind, I'm really trying to let her out of the nest more than ever, to prep her for this new era of challenges and responsibilities.

Her face brightened like a star when I sent her off on her bike to the grocery store a few blocks away to buy a few things I needed for dinner. She brought back each item on the list absolutely perfectly and didn't even spend the change.

But could someone just tell me how many notebooks to buy and whether she needs the three-subject kind or the singles?

It might just make me feel a little bit more ready.

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Daniel Graham July 30, 2012 at 09:59 am
I would buy school supplies as needed. Your child seems responsible so let her tell you what she needs. Make it her job like she is going to the store for you.
Michael Austin July 30, 2012 at 12:13 pm
I suggest keeping her load lite. Give her an I-PAD with a word processor, thesaurus.
I see kids in my neighborhood with back packs that weigh more the they do.
OhMamma July 30, 2012 at 01:24 pm
Within the first week of school, she should get lists from each of her teachers itemizing what they expect her to have for class. If things haven't changed much in the last 8-10 years, as a 6th grader she'll spend half the day in the same classroom with the same teacher for what they used to call Core Curriculum (english, literature, and history). You sound like a great mom, to be so concerned, but she'll be fine. There will be people to help her find her way in the first week, and she'll have the hang of everything before you know it.
Kari Hulac (Editor) July 30, 2012 at 02:50 pm
Good point! When we were at Target, she saw a protractor and got all excited, recalling that she used one in 5th grade. :) (Oh, and we got a Justin Bieber notebook, of course!)
Kari Hulac (Editor) July 30, 2012 at 02:52 pm
Awww, you're making me want to cry OhMamma. In a good way. You're right. I need to relax and stop trying to plan every detail out. It will work out for sure :)
B and B's Mom August 1, 2012 at 08:27 pm
At Hart Middle School, they have a generic list of supplies posted on their website which is somewhat helpful. Some teachers post more specific lists of supplies on the window of their classrooms - so once you have her class schedule you can stop by each classroom and check for it. However none of the teachers expected my daughter to have all her supplies on the first day of class! Side note - once your daughter has her class schedule (either on registration day or Mon, Aug 27 when the campus is open), I HIGHLY recommend locating each classroom and then walking them in sequence (Period A, 1, 2, 3 and so forth). This was the single best thing we did to prepare my 6th grader for Hart last year. My daughter even got to meet her block teacher ahead of time who was prepping her classroom. Good luck!
B and B's Mom August 1, 2012 at 08:28 pm
My daughter really enjoyed her first year of middle school. She liked the extra independence of changing classes, picking out her lunch, etc. The only thing we struggled with initially was our Zangle accounts. She felt I was spying on her when I checked her assignments/grades periodically. She's a pretty reliable kid and I am teaching her to be self-reliant so I could see her point. We agreed that I would tell her when I was going onto Zangle and often we would check it together. I know that won't work for all kids, but it worked for us. In the meantime, enjoy watching your daughter "flap" her wings a little...she may surprise you with how mature she is becoming....Beiber notebook not withstanding :-) ....mine sure did!
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